Topic: so my housemate just fucked a 16 year old.

[beo]

for the record, he's 26 but 16 is legal here. i thought i was cool with this when he was trying to fuck her, but now that he has, he might try and bring her out with me and my friends, and i know that wont go down well. i'm not a prude by any means but something doesn't sit quite right here.

so... fucked up, hot, or utter indifference on this one? am i being a stuck up fucktard or is he a perv?

and should i try and get with her friends...?

[Cobra951]

If it's legal, then it only depends on how you feel about it.  If it really bothers you, tell him that you're not comfortable with the situation.  Otherwise, keep it low key.

[beo]

well deep down, i'm completely fine with it. i don't see a problem at all. but he's a bit of a loner and it's not going to do him any favours. most of his friends are friends by extention via me, and knowing them, they're a little more judgemental about such things. i'm also torn, becaue as wrong as it sounds, apparently she has some hot friends... REMEMBER: 16 IS LEGAL HERE.

[Quemaqua]

Legal or not, that shit is wrong.  A ten year difference is huge at that age.  Think of all you've learned since you were 16, of all the things you didn't know and couldn't deal with back then, emotionally or otherwise.  Then realize this is a chick so you can multiply the emotional issues by about ten thousand times.  I'm sorry, call me a prude, call me whatever names you usually like to sling, but there's no fucking way I'll ever call that shit okay.

[beo]

seriously, i feel about as emotionally stable right now as i did when i was 16. i don't know if that's because i'm soft in the head or not, but i don't honestly see a massive difference. i've had my heart trampled on a few times more, but apart from that, i think i was pretty emotionally mature as a 16 year old and wouldn't want to discredit others just because of a peceived age induced wisdom. every heartbreak hurts just as bad, no matter what the age, and that's the only point of contention i can think of here.

[Ghandi]

It depends on the girl. I know many 20 year olds who act 14 and vice versa. But lets be honest - he's probably not getting with her because of her personality. As long as it's consensual and legal, there's nothing wrong with it. But it's certainly not going to get you a pat on the back from Father John. 

Also, you don't have to convince us that you should do it. It's up to you, not us.

[idolminds]

Hot friends, you say?

[beo]

yes. hot friends. this is where the real moral dilema comes in. hmmm... i didn't get much ass at 16, and i can at least blame part of that on the fact that guys my age now were nailing all the hot ones. maybe now i'm 25 it's my turn. i still don't know how i feel about this. but maybe some alcohol and a party will let me find out. it will be anecdotal material at the very least.

to be honest i just posted as a litmus test here. if the general social reaction was rage and stigma, i'd know how to react to others about this situation.

[Ghandi]

If you are even considering it now, when you are drunk and around the hot girls it won't even be a question.

[beo]

well i've had a couple of bottle of red and i'm around porn - if that counts...

but yeah. hmm.. i think hormones will win out. they obviously did for my housemate. also rockstars, they always do the legally ambigous girls. and rock stars rock by definition.

[Pugnate]

I've had sex with a 16 year old girl once.

Of course I was 12.

[Ghandi]

Pug lied once.

Of course, it was 10 MINUTES AGO.

[Pugnate]

10 minutes ago I was playing chess with you... oh wait... this is just going in the wrong direction.

[Ghandi]

Basically what you are saying is, horny 16-year-old girls are easy.

[gpw11]

No matter how anyone weighs in on the subject here, it's all conjecture.  People have been debating (including in high courts) this for a very long time, and there's no empirical evidence anywhere pointing to anything with certainty.  Essentially what it comes down to is if your roommate wants to be 'that guy'.

If, however, he starts going out with her in any way at all, you have to smack some motherfucking sense into him.  Having a fully consensual sexual experience with someone who's already been sexually active is one thing, having a mutual investment in one another is something completely different.  What the fuck could either hope to get out of it?  If it comes down to it, you're going to have to get him wasted and secretly get him a hooker.  If he's drunk enough, he doesn't even need to sleep with her, you just need pictures of them sort of drunkenly getting it on.  Phase 2 is you convincing him he's a fucking player.  Hopefully he'll wake the fuck up and start at least trying to bang girls closer to his own age rather then going to high school to pick this chick up at 3 pm every day.

[Xessive]

Oddly enough the exact same thing happened with my flatmate when I was in Canada. He was 26, she was 16, etc. Same deal. He got mixed reactions.

[nickclone]

He's a loner? I knew he was a loser, you shouldn't date someone ten years younger than you are unless they're an adult.

When I was a waiter I saw the most beautiful girl come in and she was only 16. Actually two of the most beautiful girls I saw come in were underage, but I only looked, never touched or said anything. One of them was a regular and would always come in and bat her eyes at me...she has to be 18 by now.

[beo]

He's a loner? I knew he was a loser, you shouldn't date someone ten years younger than you are unless they're an adult.

yeah, well as i've said, 16 year olds are considered adults here, at least when it comes to sex.

anyway, apparently she's a bit of a whore and was seeing a 29 year old before my housemate, so it's not like he's taking advatage of some innocent little flower here. i'm willing to admit it's a bit weird - but weird doesn't mean wrong. i'm going to cut him some slack on this one anyway, since it's the first lay he's had in five years. as long as he doesn't try and bring her to the pub with us, i really don't mind.

[Pugnate]

haha that is a bit weird.

[Cobra951]

It's not that weird.  Here in the US, sex with a minor, even if that minor is fully developed and willing, may as well be fucking murder.  In other places, laws are more biologically compatible.  If you don't like it, don't you do it.  Anything beyond that, which the law leaves alone, you should yourself leave alone, as long as it leaves you alone.  If it's in your face, and you can't abide it morally, then you need to act, but only on your own behalf, not anyone else's.

My 2 coppers anyway.

[Pugnate]

anyway, apparently she's a bit of a whore and was seeing a 29 year old before my housemate

That's what I found a bit too much. A 30 year old having sex with a 16 year old.

[WindAndConfusion]

Strom Thurmond

He married his second wife, Nancy Janice Moore, Miss South Carolina of 1965, in 1968. He was 66 years old and she only 23.

They had four children together.

[gpw11]

yeah, well as i've said, 16 year olds are considered adults here, at least when it comes to sex.

anyway, apparently she's a bit of a whore and was seeing a 29 year old before my housemate, so it's not like he's taking advatage of some innocent little flower here. i'm willing to admit it's a bit weird - but weird doesn't mean wrong. i'm going to cut him some slack on this one anyway, since it's the first lay he's had in five years. as long as he doesn't try and bring her to the pub with us, i really don't mind.

In that case your friend can use one of my co-workers lines; "Look, I know what you're going to say, but I'm not the first, the oldest, or the dirtiest guy this young teenage girl has slept with.  Fuck, she's trying to get me to do shit I haven't even head about".  I believe in that scenario it was 17-28...or something like that.  I like to make fun of him a lot.

[Antares]

Whether or not someone has sex with a girl that age is entirely between those two people as far as I'm concerned as long as its legal.  However, a 26 year old male would have to be completely out of his gourd to try to pursue a relationship with a 16 year old girl.

[Raisa]

this thread makes me sick.

1. wtf is up with using people?  no matter what age, it's wrong to use people.
2. being hot, that's what it's all about hey... the physical aspect... then the complaints come in about plastic surgery and using too much make up and low self esteem due to not being able to look hot enough.  i know young girls who ruin their lives because they think some guy really loves them, when in fact he's just after bragging rights.  then, the girls turn into whores because they never quite recover from it.
3. 16 is so young...... i remember what it's like being 16.. and no matter what you say - whether a girl is exposed to more or has led a more sheltered life - there are too many similarities in head space - i'm not going to type it all out here.. but yeah it's just wrong.

[beo]

this thread makes me sick.

yeah, didn't think you'd like it raisa.

to address your points...

1. i don't think anyone's being used if it's a mutual thing! two people want to have sex, so they do - great. there's no victim here.

2. being hot. oh come on, you can't really be that niave! in a perfect world looks wouldn't matter - but they do. pretty people get all the love in the world, and the rest of us get what we can. it's genetic imperative and as unfortunate as it seems, it's not going to change. it's not the be all and end all of a romantic or sexual relationship, but to pretend that it isn't a factor is ridiculous.

3. yeah, 16 is considered young in our society, but i knew girls at school who'd probably had sex with more partners than i (and certainly my housemate) have at our respective ages now. it's all relative - especially if you consider global marriage age averages from the past thousand years, in which time humanity hasn't physically changed a great deal. i'm convinced it's more social stigma than anything real - although it doesn't mean i won't still take the piss.

[Raisa]

yeah, didn't think you'd like it raisa.

to address your points...

1. i don't think anyone's being used if it's a mutual thing! two people want to have sex, so they do - great. there's no victim here.

i guess i was alluding to what prompted the acquaintance in the first place.

2. being hot. oh come on, you can't really be that niave! in a perfect world looks wouldn't matter - but they do. pretty people get all the love in the world, and the rest of us get what we can. it's genetic imperative and as unfortunate as it seems, it's not going to change. it's not the be all and end all of a romantic or sexual relationship, but to pretend that it isn't a factor is ridiculous.

looks do matter - to a certain degree..  and i'm not saying it's not a factor, i'm saying that people put too much importance on the way they look.  It's just grating how people keep working on the way they look that they forget to work on what's inside.  So we have a bunch of beautiful brainless twits.

3. yeah, 16 is considered young in our society, but i knew girls at school who'd probably had sex with more partners than i (and certainly my housemate) have at our respective ages now. it's all relative - especially if you consider global marriage age averages from the past thousand years, in which time humanity hasn't physically changed a great deal. i'm convinced it's more social stigma than anything real - although it doesn't mean i won't still take the piss.

being married is diff in a sense.
anyway.. i'm tired.....

[MysterD]

yeah, didn't think you'd like it raisa.

to address your points...

1. i don't think anyone's being used if it's a mutual thing! two people want to have sex, so they do - great. there's no victim here.

Okay, well there could be a possible victim...possibly...

Okay, well....let's take a bad case scenario here...
Say the two of them have sex....and, well, oh, the sex results in a pregnancy...
A few scenarios now coming to mind could happen, since she's pregnant...

1. If there's an abortion, there's definitely a victim there...the fetus. Poor thing wasn't even given a chance.

2. Say she decides to keep the baby and the older guy then decides to ditch the young girl, the girl and the baby are victims -- as it'll have no father figure in its life.

Also, I dunno, but at 16, isn't that kind of young for anyone to take care of a kid, with or without someone??? I mean, at 16 -- really, shouldn't you enjoying life and soon going off to college??? You'd have to REALLY be mature, at that age to take care of a kid, I'd say...Plus, if you ain't luckily financially well-off already, it really isn't a great idea at this age to have a kid, now is it???

I dunno, but I doubt many 16 year olds are thinking to themselves, "Honey, let's have a baby...." If you are, then...well....I dunno what to say but "At least it was planned, so good luck!"   

3. Say she decides to have the baby, say they break up, she later decides she wants nothing to do w/ the baby, and the dad decides to take it in...well, the baby's a victim -- now, it has no mother figure.

Though, the 29 year old might be actually mature enough to handle a responsibility of taking care of a baby on its own.

I dunno, but I doubt often we see or hear about the scenario of say a 29 year old and 16 year old date/go out, fall in love, get married, have kids, and wind up together happily ever after forever...Probably b/c of so many factors, from parents and friends likely disapproving of it to there likely will be differences b/t the two in the relationship (b/c of the age difference).
Usually, the much older one dating the minor, that just eventually ends up most times pretty bad in the end....REAL bad....

[Ghandi]

D, I'm pretty sure that they weren't trying to have a baby...

[Antares]

I knew I'd be kicking myself for reading one of D's posts... but anyway  Virtually the same situation would be true for any two people that get pregnant based on a one night stand or short term relationship.





Every time.

[gpw11]

Okay, well there could be a possible victim...possibly...

Okay, well....let's take a bad case scenario here...
Say the two of them have sex....and, well, oh, the sex results in a pregnancy...
A few scenarios now coming to mind could happen, since she's pregnant...

1. If there's an abortion, there's definitely a victim there...the fetus. Poor thing wasn't even given a chance.

2. Say she decides to keep the baby and the older guy then decides to ditch the young girl, the girl and the baby are victims -- as it'll have no father figure in its life.

Also, I dunno, but at 16, isn't that kind of young for anyone to take care of a kid, with or without someone??? I mean, at 16 -- really, shouldn't you enjoying life and soon going off to college??? You'd have to REALLY be mature, at that age to take care of a kid, I'd say...Plus, if you ain't luckily financially well-off already, it really isn't a great idea at this age to have a kid, now is it???

I dunno, but I doubt many 16 year olds are thinking to themselves, "Honey, let's have a baby...." If you are, then...well....I dunno what to say but "At least it was planned, so good luck!"   

3. Say she decides to have the baby, say they break up, she later decides she wants nothing to do w/ the baby, and the dad decides to take it in...well, the baby's a victim -- now, it has no mother figure.

Though, the 29 year old might be actually mature enough to handle a responsibility of taking care of a baby on its own.

I dunno, but I doubt often we see or hear about the scenario of say a 29 year old and 16 year old date/go out, fall in love, get married, have kids, and wind up together happily ever after forever...Probably b/c of so many factors, from parents and friends likely disapproving of it to there likely will be differences b/t the two in the relationship (b/c of the age difference).
Usually, the much older one dating the minor, that just eventually ends up most times pretty bad in the end....REAL bad....

.....  What the fuck?

"Sure, you may think camping is safe, harmless fun, but think about the possibilities:

1.) a plane could crash in the woods...right where YOU'RE SLEEPING! 

2.) forest fires.

[Jedi]

Jesus D, there are no victims between two consenting legal adults who are using protection especially if they're on the same page about what’s going on (ie one night stand or something more).

[gpw11]

Lies, the haploids are always victims.

[Antares]

damn you GPW for making me use a dictionary.

[Jedi]

Hahaha 

[gpw11]

I just came across this (don't ask how) and now need to know if this is the same housemate who was arrested in the child pornography sting.

[Cools!]

Haha.

[beo]

Yes, gpw, it was. Think I might've reacted somewhat differently if I knew what was on his hard drive...

[gpw11]

Ahahaha.  That...that is amazing.