Topic: So how's life?

[Quemaqua]

I don't know if I've talked about any life stuff in other threads. I might have, but my memory is not great. Regardless, things been a bit on the rough side for me. My plans changed as things got more serious with my girlfriend, and she was set to move out here (to follow me to California from Texas). I was ready to propose. Then we had a couple of disagreements and misunderstandings, and ultimately it seemed like this wasn't the best time for her to move out. I was sad, but things seemed okay. Then they started not seeming okay. We broke up a short while later. We were together somewhere around 6 years.

I feel bad. It wasn't always the easiest relationship, but I thought it was a good one. Thought she would be the one I'd likely spend the rest of my life with, so it's been hard. But I'm also trying not to let it get me too far down. I'm going back to school in the fall with the hope of transferring to a local university. My goal is, as silly as it sounds, an Asian Studies degree with a Japanese minor, mostly due to necessity. It's the only local school I can afford, I can live cheaper here than anywhere because I'm renting from a family member, and it's theoretically feasible that I may get enough government funding to afford it.

If it all pans out, my hope is to take a job teaching English in Japan for a year. You know, like every other foreigner that goes to Japan. Supposedly the major companies will set you up with an apartment, give you a reasonable salary, and don't require any teaching experience or certification. You just need a BA in something and need to be a native speaker. I figure with a writing and editing background plus Japanese language experience, even if limited, I'd be a likely enough candidate.

So yeah, my life has gone from semi-stable to very weird in a short time, and I think what I really need is to aim for something very far outside my comfort zone. I've been living in there too long, and it's not done me any favors. And with the state of American politics, now seems like a great time to start making preparations to get the fuck out!

Anyway, what are the rest of you up to?

[idolminds]

Most of this you'll already know but I'll post it for others.

Not a lot happening in my life. I started a walking/exercise routine and watching what I eat after stepping on a scale this spring and being a bit shocked by how much weight I put on over the winter. Started that in...May? I think? I've lost 20lbs so far which puts me back to where I was. Going to keep it up though and try get into better shape overall because hey, why not? I'm already here.

Other than that...same old shit. My life is pretty boring.

[K-man]

Idol actually motivated me to start getting into shape, too.  Started eating better around a month ago.  Been working out for two weeks now.  Lost some weight, gained some muscle mass, feel tons better.  Prepping for baby # 2 to arrive (estimated due date of September 23).  After which hopefully my motivation and progress won't implode.  Still plugging away trying to get better at guitar, and i'm still making time for a game at a time (right now it's Destiny).

I have very little to complain about right now, which is most welcome after the couple years of overwhelming loss I experienced (and the related stress and red tape that followed).  I am very fortunate.

[Quemaqua]

Been working out myself. Got a little home gym set up here since I can't afford to renew my gym membership. Kman was talking about homemade Bulgarian bags, so I made myself one out of an inner tube and some wood pellets, and though it ended up too light (sand is preferable, despite having to be more careful about leakage), it's really nice as an accompaniment to cardio stuff. Have a trampoline, the bag, a reflex bag (punching bag), some free weights, and some strength bands. Pretty good stuff, and it actually feels great not having to go to the gym because the gym was a good ways into town for me. Easier to make it a regular thing, even when I don't particularly feel like it, since I don't have to look decent and don't have to drive anywhere.

[scottws]

Que, I'm sorry to hear about the girlfriend.  It sounds like you have a plan for yourself, though.  That's great!

It's also good to hear about people focusing on their health.  It's important and makes a big difference as you get older.

As for me, I haven't really updated anyone on my stuff.  I still live in South Florida and I still work at the same place, though I've switched to Information Security.  As for relationships, you know that I split with Jennie May 2015 and was divorced in August 2015.  Between that time, I dated on Tinder and OK Cupid and did meet someone I really liked.  I've been with her ever since and we now live together.  She is absolutely great!  She's smart, witty, caring, compassionate, passionate, good looking, and has a great career.  Things are going really well with us, and I'll probably propose in the next couple of months.

As for Jennie and my (former? I'm not sure what I'm supposed to call him) stepson, I don't really have a lot of contact with them or the rest of that family anymore.  I gave Jennie pretty much everything except my car, my clothes, a few odds and ends that were mine that she didn't care about, the laptop, and a couple couches.  I just wanted to get out and move on.  We were cordial for awhile but then in November I switched my Amazon Prime household benefit from her to my new g/f.  I guess Amazon sends a notice when you do that, because after doing so I got a really, really nasty message from Jennie about it.  I think she thought I waited until shortly before Christmas out of spite and was doing it to get back at her.  But that wasn't the case at all.  I never do anything out of spite.  She knew me for 10 years and she should know that.  Anyway, we got into a big argument which started when I said: "You got everything in the divorce.  Isn't that enough?  You need my Amazon Prime too?"

We've only talked a single time since.  She started seeing a therapist and reached out to me on the therapist's advice.  We had a long, awkward conversation that most mostly just about catching up and having small talk.  I guess there was something she wanted to tell me in person and she wanted to go get drinks or dinner, but I don't really want to give her the time of day, so I haven't bothered with that.  Since then, she's sent a few nasty messages to some of my family.  She's really a pretty petty and pathetic person.

I've seen my stepson only a few times but I do talk to him, though somewhat infrequently.  He's in high school now, but not doing any extracurriculars anymore.  I haven't seen my dog since last October.  I really miss him.

I try to run 2 - 4 miles every other day, but it usually ends up being every three days instead.  I lost about 35 pounds since the divorce.  Not because of stress though.  I was just overweight.  I weighed over 200 and now I'm down to 170.  I ran in the Miami Half Marathon this year and I might do it again next year.  It depends on if I can find someone to run with.

Overall, my life is a little complicated, but it's going really well.

Oh, I also learned to ride a motorcycle.  I'm also working on getting my concealed carry license.  I'll probably get a shotgun first, then think about a handgun sometime later.

[Cobra951]

I wish it was an isolated case.  That seems to be a fairly prevalent progression of emotional states for women when long relationships fall apart.  I'm quite familiar with it.  The pettiness and implacable grudges are predominantly female things.  Men just want to move on and keep things civil, even when they lose the most.  Sorry if that comes across as sexist, but there's a difference between prejudice and judgment based on long experience with facts.

Me?  I live day-to-day in a world I no longer understand, and which seems to have no place for me.  Sandy is recuperating from some knee surgery, and that's taking a long time.  The way she is, she doesn't want me around until she's (literally) back on her feet.  I guess she doesn't want to have me see her in diminished condition.  I actually understand that.  I'd probably feel the same if I was laid up, looking like hell, and then limping around for another month.

I concentrate on my small pleasures, routines and obligations.  Distraction from the isolation is key to maintaining high spirits.  If I can keep this going till the day I die, I'll call it par for the course.  But I suck at golf.

[scottws]

Yeah, I don't really understand the purpose of wasting your effort and emotions on the past like that.  It serves no purpose and probably only makes you miserable.  It does seem like a female thing.

My new g/f said of the Amazon Prime episode: "You should have told her that she should use some of the $80,000 in home equity you gave her to sign up for the $100 membership herself."  Haha!  True that!

[Quemaqua]

I've not had the worst experiences with relationships ending. Usually been cordial. I'm still friends with my last 3 exes, including my ex-wife, though it's not necessarily an easy thing. Though I'd rather

Ex-wife actually contacted me recently, haven't heard from her in a couple years. She's ... had a rough time of things. Her contacting me was nothing creepy like she wants to get back together, but it made me very sad to hear that things hadn't improved for her the way I hoped they would after we split up. Between that, the end of my last relationship, and the state of American politics, it's been a struggle not to be depressed at times. Keeping busy helps, so I suspect school will be a good thing. Exercise is great too, of course.

[scottws]

Update: I might get the Zika virus.  I don't live in Wynwood, or the greater Miami area for that matter, but I don't live that far away either.  I live about 35 minutes Northwest of Fort Lauderdale.  It won't be long before it makes its way up here.

[Cobra951]

That sucks.  Take a long trip with your girlfriend to some Nordic lands, maybe Alaska.  She's the one with a lot at risk here.

[K-man]

I am hopeful Hayes enters the world before Zika works its way to Tennessee.  I have doubts it will before the cold snap, but it's certainly something I don't want to have to worry about either. 

[ender]

Going well over here for the most part. I've been super busy at work as the other designer that I worked with left for a new job in February. Been running the design department all by my lonesome – the plus side is I got a promotion and pay increase. In May, my girlfriend broke up with me. Though I am kind of not surprised, as I was dating someone who was 20 years old... and I'm 31. We're still friends but there for a few months I was bummed out. Going out on a date with another girl I met through an event at work – she's closer to my age (27), we'll see how that goes!

It's been a really hot and humid summer in NYC... but I've been so busy I haven't had a chance to hit the beach all summer. Planning on taking the bus to Rockaways this weekend, so I can soak up the sun and get some swimming in before summer is all but gone.

Saving money for my trip to Tokyo in October... I've done surprisingly well! Glad I spent so much time planning for this trip – I usually book a trip last minute and then I'm complete broke while there. This will be my first major "adult" vacation that actually feels like I can enjoy myself without coming home in debt

Mostly I've been spending my nights coding and developing my new portfolio site. I'm trying to put together a cohesive body of work so I can start applying for some new jobs. Feeling the need to move more towards motion design/graphics – so I'm applying at several places that are involved in working on HBO title sequences and video game/film commercials here in NYC. I have a few connections there, so delving further into After Effects to get my foot in the door. Wish me luck.

[scottws]

That's awesome, ender!  I've always been interested in how graphics like you see in ESPN interstitials were made.  There is some really cool stuff I've seen out there.

[ender]

That's awesome, ender!  I've always been interested in how graphics like you see in ESPN interstitials were made.  There is some really cool stuff I've seen out there.

Yeah, After Effects is really amazing when you start getting deep into it. I've done some motion and animation projects for a coffee company in San Francisco and another for a band's tour... really wish I would have delved deeper earlier, but I guess it's never too late to start!

[Pugnate]

I've been incredibly sick for the last two to three weeks. Fever every day, joint and muscle aches, massive headaches, can't get out of bed, nausea, and worse. Started to think I was dying lol. All tests were pretty much clear. Finally, I was diagnosed with typhoid.

The double dose of antibiotics finally killed the fever but the side effects are anxiety, lethargy, a different sort of nausea.

At least it's killing the typhoid. 

[Cobra951]

Geez, typhoid.  Get well soon, man.

[scottws]

Typhoid?  I didn't even know that was still a thing.  Glad you are starting to get better.

[Quemaqua]

That's really awful, man. Get well soon! Certainly hope it doesn't stick with you much longer.

[Cobra951]

Typhoid?  I didn't even know that was still a thing.  Glad you are starting to get better.

I read about it after my last post, thinking the same thing--a horrible plague from ages past.  Well, it is fairly under control here (6000 cases per year in the US), but in the developing world, it's still a problem.  India has it worst.  It comes from food contaminated by feces from an infected person, a form of salmonella.  Pug should get medieval on whatever food place is responsible.

[Pugnate]

Yea probably from something I ate cooked by someone who didn't wash their hands. Ewww. I was feeling adventurous so I ate at a really rundown shack where normally people on the street eat. Shouldn't have.

Even the typhoid tests came back clear, to be honest. Because it is a really fragile thing it gets easily masked they say.

Anyway, the doctor guesses it is typhoid and the double dose of antibiotics is certainly helping. After 14 days of fever every day my fever is gone. It has been replaced by bad side effects from the antibiotics but hopefully it will be fine soon.

We are moving in 4 weeks and the frustrating thing is that there is so much to do and it's slowed down.

[Quemaqua]

You feeling better by now, Pug? Hope so. Your move must be right around the corner at this point!

So I just applied to CSU Chico today. I've got a full semester at the local college this fall, started this week. Mostly BS stuff I need for transfer credits or to go toward my degree plan at Chico, but I did get into a Japanese class. It's below me, but that's good, as I have some gaps I need to fill in, and I need to get used to actually like ... memorizing rules and preparing for test-type stuff. My self-learning is great and all, but it hasn't prepared me especially well for doing this stuff in a classroom environment. I'm happy about it. It'll shake things up, get me out of my comfort zone.

Anyway, I'm excited about the possibility of actually getting to attend a university. I've enjoyed my time at school a lot. I told myself I wasn't going to get my hopes up about going to Chico given that residency is supposed to be tough to get if you've left the state, and I don't know how I would swing non-resident rates (I'm considered a resident at Butte, the local college, but the barrier to entry isn't as high), but as it turns out, I'm kinda getting my hopes up.

Life is a weird thing. Certainly wouldn't have imagined myself attempting to go back to school at my age. Then again, I didn't picture just about anything that's happened to me over the last 10 years. It's sure been an adventure.

[Pugnate]

Yes thank you! It was a terrible time. I realized I was sick 2 weeks before the fever, I just didn't realize. Also, it relapsed for a few days but now it seems to be gone.

That sounds really cool regarding the university. I wish they weren't so expensive in North America.

[angrykeebler]

Hey. It's been a while.

Still in the Navy. Have spent literally 0 hours on a ship. Work in a hospital here in sunny San Diego. Wanted to see the world and the Navy sent me 2 hours south of home and gave me shore duty. Great. Good tacos though.

Got 2 years left and may stay in. It's not too bad. Benefits are great and can go to school using the GI Bill when/if i choose to get out.

2 years and 2 relationships. One ended cordially and I still talk to her often. One ended in a shitstorm.

Stopped smoking yaaay. Don't game much. I did get an xboxone to play with my friends back home and i've been playing Overwatch on it. I think back to the days I'd sit in front of my PC playing DoD with gpw and destroying him every chance I got. He literally couldnt touch me. How terrible was he at that game? Super terrible is the answer. hahah gpw sucks

[Pugnate]

I am glad it ended in a shitstorm. You deserve nothing better.

[Quemaqua]

Man, I must have totally missed that keebs post. wtf

I can't imagine working for the government, much less the military, at this point. Yeesh.

I started my first day of school today. First time in classes at a university. Despite having taken plenty of college classes, it felt a bit surreal to be at like ... an institution. It's kind of the same, but there's a little something extra, a little air of electricity, and I'm sure the coursework will be substantially more intellectually stimulating. I have 7 books for my first three classes. Don't know how many for the next 2, which I guess I'll find out tomorrow. I'm going to be ... uh, rather busy this semester, I suspect. So much reading, good lord.

Excited, though. And this is almost all stuff I want to take, at least this semester, so that's exciting too. Campus is really nice. Which is good, because I had to walk like 50 miles of it after parking at the ass-end of town. I've never seen so many cars in my life, holy shit.

I am very tired already.