Topic: I'm such a dick.

[Quemaqua]

But I can't help it.  I have to post this.

Okay, my ex boyfriend and I used to wwrite together, and stuff. MAde caricters and everyhting, and during the break up, he said I could keep them. I even have a sighned peice of paper sayign I ahve legal rights to his caricters.
Well, My caricters mean the world to me. One diied and I criied for four days over his dead body. They ahev allways just been their.
Today he e-mailed me sayign I was no longer premitted to write about them. At all.
What the heck am I gonna do? One was a main chairicter, and the other three were just support and easy to replace. Please, a little help?

Wul, mebe u shud lrn 2 spehl CHARACTERS b4 u woryr abuot how they ahev allways been their.

Jeezus.  I laughed for probably five minutes.

[iPPi]

Yea... that was pretty bad.

[scottws]

I'd hate to see this "writer's" "works."

[Ghandi]

It's that new age writing style. Obviously you guy's aren't "in" with all the new trends. 

[Cobra951]

Tonight, my ex calls me from a gas station, saying her car was "smoking".  I guess there was no coolant in it at all.  So she's trying to talk on the phone while attempting to communicate with the attendant.  So she tells me, "I'm telling him to pour the antifreeze in, but he doesn't understand me.  Want to talk to him in Spanish?"  I replied "ok".  The guy gets on the phone, so I tell him "ella quiere que le heches el antifreeze ahora."  I get unintelligible pseudo-English in return.  "Hablas espanol?", I ask.  "No spanish, no".  The guy couldn't communicate in English, or in Spanish.

And you're worried about the writing trends of the average internet denizen?   

[gpw11]

ahahaha.  It's like my roommate's girlfriend.  For the longest time we figured we just thought we couldn't communicate with her because she's an immigrant.  Then I started actually listening to what she was saying.  I don't care where you're from, when you ask questions like "are there gay black people too?" you're just a retard. 

Or maybe it's just Koreans.  Yeah.....those Koreans.  Good thing none of those here eh?  Imagine what would happen if there were some Koreans here....they'd probably just bicker all the time.

[Quemaqua]

The world is a scary place and the stupidity of people frightens me.

[Xessive]

The world is a scary place and the stupidity of people frightens me.

Haha we're not helping when we increase their mating habits, drastically raising the chances of preserving their genetic material among our future generations

Still, the world would be a boring place if we didn't have stupid people I can always enjoy watching an idiot being taught a lesson time and time again

[angrykeebler]

Or maybe it's just Koreans.  Yeah.....those Koreans.  Good thing none of those here eh?  Imagine what would happen if there were some Koreans here....they'd probably just bicker all the time.

man... dont make us nuke canada.. thats right..we got nukes now

[scottws]

Or maybe it's just Koreans.  Yeah.....those Koreans.  Good thing none of those here eh?  Imagine what would happen if there were some Koreans here....they'd probably just bicker all the time.

This is honestly not meant to sound ignorant or offensive...

Just how many Asian immigrants are there in Canada?  Or just immigrants in general.  The company I work for has stores worldwide.  We support the United States and Canada.  I swear that 90% of the time I have a Canadian store call in, I'm speaking to someone who either barely speaks English, or someone who has a very thick, non-North American accent.

[Antares]

I was planning to post this picture in a journal about my day like in que's post, but I never got around to it mainly because I never took pictures of anything in my cubicle but this.

This seriously represents the level of stupidity that I deal with on a daily basis.  Personal information has been removed to protect the moronic, but note that I left the date of birth so you know it wasn't written by a two year old.  At the scene of a car accidents sometimes police officers ask people involved to make a written statement, this was one I got a while back.  $20 to the first person who correctly decodes this pile of crap from redneck to english:

[scottws]

Wow.  That's pretty terrible.

[Quemaqua]

I can figure most of it out... not the first bit.

Translation:

"I was leaving the *hoplet?* with my *month in tow?* to take her home, and I was getting in my lane and the next thing I know I was hit and the guy took off."

Yes, that's horrible.  I deal with a lot of that at my job, too.  It's really sad.

[idolminds]

Uh...after witting and rewriting that, what I got out of it was this chick was leaving the hospital with a newborn (month old?), made a lane change, got sideswiped and the guy that hit her left the scene. Am I even close?

[Antares]

The "living the hoplet" part is a mystery wrapped in a riddle, i'll be shocked if anyone figures it out.


You're both off about "morth in low"


You are right about the hit and run though.

[idolminds]

*stabs self in face over the stupidity*

[Ghandi]

leaving the hotel and mother in law.

A winner is me?

[JacksRag(e)]

man... dont make us nuke canada.. thats right..we got nukes now

Man, that's the North Koreans, you Southies are weak.

[Antares]

Well, if you put elements of everyone's ideas together you've got it:

I was leaving the hospital with my mother in law to take her home, I was getting in my lane, and next thing I knew I was hit and the guy took off.

[idolminds]

I never would have got mother in law out of all that. Yikes.

[angrykeebler]

Man, that's the North Koreans, you Southies are weak.

uhhh...i defected?

[Pugnate]

Well, if you put elements of everyone's ideas together you've got it:

I was leaving the hospital with my mother in law to take her home, I was getting in my lane, and next thing I knew I was hit and the guy took off.

...

you are married? 

[TheOtherBelmont]

...

you are married? 

I hope you are joking...read the rest of the topic if you aren't, he's referring to the report in the picture he took.  If you are joking then never mind.

[ren]

that doesn't change the fact that he's married

[Cools]

Should I consider myself lucky if I understood most of the letter? I think I got all of it except for *hoplet, which I think is a *hospital.

This is honestly not meant to sound ignorant or offensive...

Both?

You are all dicks, hurray for dickery!

[Antares]

I'm a nun, which means I'm married to god.