Topic: no text

[W7RE]

no text

[Cobra951]

I'm in a nasty terminal-seeming state myself.  So believe me when I say that I sympathize.  Life can throw you such curb balls that you end up completely overwhelmed and unable to cope.  All I can say, and halfheartedly at that, is don't give up all hope.  Every day you survive is one more opportunity for things to change for the better.  It can't get much worse, not without buying the farm, right?  Let's hang a while longer, see what happens.

[K-man]

"When the VA Tech shooting happened, the main thing that's gone through my head over and over is "how does this affect me, and should I really care? So 32 people are dead. I didn't know them. I didn't know the shooter. Oh well, back to whatever I was doing." The biggest impact it had on me was that my Tivo caught some special about it, that aired in place of My Name Is Earl."

I certainly don't blame you here.  I'm sorry it happened, and I'm sad that people are dead, but it's not my place to mourn or grieve.  In fact I think that takes away from the people involved that are really suffering.



I think you would benefit from speaking to a counselor, seriously.

[idolminds]

Heh, been there. Actually meeting the guys in CA was pretty cool. I had to be like...a normal person for an entire week.

[angrykeebler]

GET A JOB. IT SUCKS BUT EVERYONE DOES IT. SO CAN YOU.

SUCK IT UP.

[angrykeebler]

I guess you didn't read the whole thing. It's not about just getting a job. Does everyone imagine ways to kill their parents, wether it shoudl be quick, messy, painful, etc?

GET THERAPY. IT SUCKS BUT PEOPLE DO IT. SO CAN YOU.

SUCK IT UP.

[Jedi]

Hmm Start by getting a job then move the fuck out of your parents place. Also talk to someone about these thoughts and what you're feeling they sound pretty heavy.
But until you do something you'll be stuck in this cycle, and you know how much this sucks already so do something about it. Just don't turn into one of those assholes that blames everything on everybody else, get a job doing something (by the way many people have jobs they hate but most accept that it's a stepping stone) and move out.

Also about the VT thing, yeah look it's bad that it happened but it didn't affect me. Few years back when London had those bombs go off I didn't care much other than my brother was in the city - once I knew he was ok I stopped giving a shit. You sound like you're expected to care - well you're not.

[iPPi]

W7RE, everybody has problems.  It seems to me though that you aren't willing to face your problems.  You need to go see and talk to someone who may be able to give you counsel or something to help how you feel.

I mean, you know how to solve your problem right?  Get a job, move out of your parents' place, and already your problems would start to go away.  Alternatively, go back to school.

Seriously, posting about your problems here doesn't do anything.  What you need to do is take action to remedy your problem.

[angrykeebler]

just blame my parents for making it a shithole.

Pretty much, there is your problem right there.  You can blame your parents all you want but from what you told me, I am pretty sure its not their fault.

[angrykeebler]

From what I've told you? I told you about how they get pissy about the stupidest shit, and try to control the smallest details of my life. My mother wants control over how I fucking butter my bread, I'm sorry but if you think that's a problme that is on MY end, you're a fucking retard. My fault I'm living here? Yea. My fault they deserve to burn alive? no.

From what you told me you are seriously a waste of life. I am not kidding nor exaggerating. IF YOU HATE THEM SO MUCH THEN MOVE OUT. No where to go? LIVE ON THE FUCKING STREETS YOU LAZY, PATHETIC, PIECE OF GARBAGE. THEN YOU CAN SEE HOW PEOPLE WHO REALLY HAVE NO WHERE TO GO END UP.

I think you parents are fucking SAINTS to let you live in their house and not charge you rent. It seems to me that your parents being controlling is a TINY, TINY price to pay for having them hole up an absolutely USELESS (Huge, HUGE emphasis on the word "useless" btw) son.

They are controlling? How long have they put up with you just holed up in your room playing WoW all day? Personally, I think they are just fucking sick of having you there. I know I would be.

I feel for your parents and hope they come to their senses and wash their hands of you. Then maybe when the pressure is on you will think to yourself "God, I am such a useless, ignorant postule. I should get a job or AT LEAST beg for change on the street corner."

I personally think you are the whiniest, useless human I know and when I have kids I hope to God they are  nothing like you.

Wise up, asshole. Call me a retard? Thats the pot calling the kettle black.

(P.S Don't anyone delete this. He needs to read it)

[idolminds]

Well...that could have gone smoother....

[W7RE]

Yes, you're a fucking retard. You read a few blocks of text where I'm venting about my shit situation and suddenly you think you know everything. Fuck you, dipshit. I thought I was emotionless, you need a steel pipe across the head. People like you are the reason I fucking hate humanity. Fuck you and everyone who looks like you. I hope you die. Soon.

[angrykeebler]

Yes, you're a fucking retard. You read a few blocks of text where I'm venting about my shit situation and suddenly you think you know everything. Fuck you, dipshit. I thought I was emotionless, you need a steel pipe across the head. People like you are the reason I fucking hate humanity. Fuck you and everyone who looks like you. I hope you die. Soon.

I'm through with you. Stay in your own personal hell and have a great time. I, on the other hand, will be enjoying life, taking the bad with the good.

When your parents finally come to their senses and give you the boot, PM me their phone number so I can call them and congratulate them.

[idolminds]

I think he deleted his profile. I didn't even know you could do that...

[angrykeebler]

I think he deleted his profile. I didn't even know you could do that...

Okay for the record, I know I was being way, waaaay too harsh on him but come on. I know a bunch of you were thinking exactly what I was thinking. He needs to get his act together and all of us being sympathetic was not working. His problems are beyond this community and, from the looks of it, he needs to work it out for himself.

[Ghandi]

Keeb...some people like to go in the front door to do things- direct, to the point, people notice. Some people use the back door- subtle, but often effective. You blew a hole in the side of the house. Everyone noticed, and you got inside the house. The thing is, now theres a fucking hole in the side of the house.

In any case, without drawing that analogy out any longer, ippi's post is excellent. I was going to say that long ago but didn't.

[angrykeebler]

He's made how many posts like this? It is always the exact same thing. Nothing has changed. If theres a hole in the side of the house then at least something is different.

[Quemaqua]

Boy, that's... wow.

So I didn't read anything here before it was all gone, so I can't respond directly.  All I can say is that dude, that was uncalled for Keebs.  Seriously.  If this were anywhere else, your ass would have been suspended or banned.  I hear you, but cool it.

But at the same time, Keebs has a point.  Not exactly a tactful one, but the basic principle is that only *you* can help *you*.  No matter how many other people try, it all comes down to getting the job done yourself.  I've always liked you, W7.  I don't know if you're even going to come back and look at any of this, but it bears saying anyway.  But at some point you have to just say fuck it and get up and do it.  I hate my job.  I hate it in every way that it's possible to hate something, and this leads to horrendous circumstances like me fantasizing about slaughtering my boss.  I know how that goes.  But sometimes you just have to suck it up and realize that being at the bottom of your personal barrel is a hell of a lot worse.  I think right now you're probably seeing that.

My suggestion to you is very simple.  Firstly, don't give up.  Don't think for a minute that you're at the end of your rope.  You can get out even if it doesn't seem like it. And while you may want to bitch-slap anybody that tells you that right now, it's a truth you'll realize before too long.  Secondly, the road to recovery is an active one.  Don't just sit around.  Try a therapist.  It doesn't mean you're crazy or pathetic, it's just a good way to get somebody to listen to you and not give you shit.  It's a good way to just throw everything out on the table and then look at the pieces individually, make sense of them.  I used to talk to my Dad about math problems I couldn't solve.  But as soon as I'd ask him about them and explain why I didn't get it, it would become clear to me.  Sometimes you just need other people as a sounding board.  Therapy can do that.  Lastly, but part of the same thing about being active, just force yourself to do stuff.  Jobs suck a lot of the time, but at the same time they can make you feel better.  Even if you hate your job you'll probably still feel less guilty about things since you have one, and earning your own keep is its own kind of reward.

You're a smart and talented guy.  Don't let yourself throw that out.  You've let yourself sink down for too long, and it's really showing on you now, but that doesn't mean you can't get the fuck back up.  Because you're just as good as everybody else.  You just have to start trying again.

[angrykeebler]

Look, my point is that its literally beens years since he has been saying this shit. YEARS. We always give the same exact advice in the same patronizing way and surprise,surprise he does nothing. A year or two goes by and he makes a near identical post. In fact, I daresay its gotten worse. When he made the first of these posts at least he was still in school. We gave the same advice then and he didn't listen.

He probably won't listen now either. At least, he will remember what I said. I don't hate the guy but wish him the best but it will only happen if he gets off his ass.

[TheOtherBelmont]

Damn, Mitch, if you are still reading this, get a hold of me on Trillian or email me (my email should be in my profile) and I can give you my phone number or you can give me yours again, I've been wanting to talk to you for awhile now but you're never online anymore.  I don't know what his original post was about but I think you could have handled that a lot smoother Keebs, there are ways to tell someone to get their shit straight better than you did, JB's post is a good example.  I'm not mad at you since I don't know what went down here since I was at work, but I really dislike seeing someone talk to one of my best friends like that.  You could have just ignored his venting if you were really getting that worked up about it. 

I do agree with everyone that says he needs to take action, I've told him that on the phone before, but I didn't yell at him about like a boot camp instructor and I didn't hold his hand either.  I could understand a reaction like Keebs if he's made a boatload of venting posts, but he's maybe only made two or three that I know of, and a good chunk of us here has done the same thing.

[Pugnate]

I'm in a nasty terminal-seeming state myself.  So believe me when I say that I sympathize.  Life can throw you such curb balls that you end up completely overwhelmed and unable to cope.  All I can say, and halfheartedly at that, is don't give up all hope.  Every day you survive is one more opportunity for things to change for the better.  It can't get much worse, not without buying the farm, right?  Let's hang a while longer, see what happens.

I always thought it was 'curve ball'.

Anyway I read W7RE's post last night and it made me sad, yet I couldn't think of anything to say. I think you need to go step by step. First step is to get a job, and then move out. Once you do that, your environment will change.

Currently you probably feel like you are rotting, and I know how that feels. Take baby steps to make change.

[Quemaqua]

He probably won't listen now either. At least, he will remember what I said. I don't hate the guy but wish him the best but it will only happen if he gets off his ass.

I agree completely.  However, like Tet said, that wasn't the way to go about it.  I understand your anger, and I'm sure you think less of it in hindsight, but still... just take a few breaths.  No need for flaming.

[angrykeebler]

Damn, Mitch, if you are still reading this, get a hold of me on Trillian or email me (my email should be in my profile) and I can give you my phone number or you can give me yours again, I've been wanting to talk to you for awhile now but you're never online anymore.  I don't know what his original post was about but I think you could have handled that a lot smoother Keebs, there are ways to tell someone to get their shit straight better than you did, JB's post is a good example.  I'm not mad at you since I don't know what went down here since I was at work, but I really dislike seeing someone talk to one of my best friends like that.  You could have just ignored his venting if you were really getting that worked up about it. 

I do agree with everyone that says he needs to take action, I've told him that on the phone before, but I didn't yell at him about like a boot camp instructor and I didn't hold his hand either.  I could understand a reaction like Keebs if he's made a boatload of venting posts, but he's maybe only made two or three that I know of, and a good chunk of us here has done the same thing.

Many of us make rants like this but its different for him. His is a downward spiral and he does NOTHING to fix it. Que rants about hating humanity but at least he is doing his best and working and NOT fantasizing about killing his parents.

To be truthful, most of my rage in my posts came as a direct result of reading about W7RE fantasizing killing his parents. I read that and then wrote my posts and so you know why I was so harsh. It really, really made me mad.

I hope that as his friend you can help him. Really, I do.

[Ghandi]

I hope you get a hold of him, Tet. I was trying to but considering we have never talked before it would probably be better coming from you

Also, W7RE I don't know why you deleted your account. Maybe anger. Maybe a sudden life-changing epiphany. I don't know. But every post here was trying to help (yes even keebs, in his perverted keeb-like approach). But deleting your posts- deleting your account- this solves nothing. Running away solves nothing. It turns out that our problems are pretty good at keeping up with us until we turn around to face them.

[PyroMenace]

Yea man, don't leave us hanging. You haven't really posted here hardly at all for a while, you need to post more damnit! But from what everyone says is the right thing, taking action. Your probably making it seem like its harder than it really is. Don't worry about school, just get a job, they do suck, but working them is usually easy. If you don't like it, find something else until you can move out. Trust me man, its not as hard as it seems.

[Pugnate]

W7RE dearest come back.

[Jedi]

I think in a round about way W7RE deleted his post and account because he's not getting the desired response. Keeb said the same thing everyone else did just with less.. um... tact. But the basic message was, help yourself because no one else can or will. Perhaps he didn't post here looking for help but for people to tell him how tough he's go it etc etc.
I could be barking up the totaly wrong tree here, but I that what I think has happened here. Those who know him better should be the ones to pursue this.

I do hope everything works out for him but at the end of the day he has to start making changes every adult knows that.

[TheOtherBelmont]

I think in a round about way W7RE deleted his post and account because he's not getting the desired response. Keeb said the same thing everyone else did just with less.. um... tact. But the basic message was, help yourself because no one else can or will. Perhaps he didn't post here looking for help but for people to tell him how tough he's go it etc etc.
I could be barking up the totaly wrong tree here, but I that what I think has happened here. Those who know him better should be the ones to pursue this.

I do hope everything works out for him but at the end of the day he has to start making changes every adult knows that.

I get what you are saying, but its wrong, and I only say that because I'm talking to him on Trillian now, but I can see how you would get that answer though, so it's no biggie.  I'll make another post here in a bit possibly maybe to give everyone some perspective on what's going on since I know him the best and his parents as well.  He might be coming back and he knows that deleting the post and leaving was kind of childish of him, but he's kind of cooled down a bit, he also knows his situation is his own fault, but the shit his parents are doing to him is not helping at all.

[TheOtherBelmont]

Okay, I just had a good chat with him, hopefully he will come back and clear up any thing that needs clarification.  Some of it was him not wording things quite right and some of it just people here not knowing the full situation and that's no one's fault.  He knows he's at fault for a lot of the shit going on his life right now, but it's not all him at the same time.

[Pugnate]

I am glad he is back, even though he is a n00b with zero posts now. Also Keebler may have sounded aggressive, but we all obviously want the best for you. I was in a similar situation as W7re a few years ago, and it is really really hard to break out of a rut when you are dependent.

[Cobra951]

Okay for the record, I know I was being way, waaaay too harsh on him but come on. I know a bunch of you were thinking exactly what I was thinking. He needs to get his act together and all of us being sympathetic was not working. His problems are beyond this community and, from the looks of it, he needs to work it out for himself.

No.  But I remember a time when I was an immature child who thought he could control everything, and who didn't have the perspective or experience to understand a bad situation such as this one.  That immature brat would have blamed him for all his troubles.  That arrogant youth would have denied any possibility of circumstances being too adverse for one man to deal with alone.  But not me.

[angrykeebler]

No.  But I remember a time when I was an immature child who thought he could control everything, and who didn't have the perspective or experience to understand a bad situation such as this one.  That immature brat would have blamed him for all his troubles.  That arrogant youth would have denied any possibility of circumstances being too adverse for one man to deal with alone.  But not me.

uhhh..



What?

[Cobra951]

I rest my case.   

[angrykeebler]

I rest my case.   

k......

[Jedi]

In this thread I'm happy to be wrong.

[W7RE]

I guess I should explain myself. I wasn't looking for pity, or necessarily even advice. I just wanted to vent, and felt like this was a place where I could do that. I expected some people to tell me to go get a job, some to say "yea, that sucks", and othera to not even reply. I felt like I was attacked, which made me question if I even wanted to come here anymore. I haven't really posted in here for a long time anyway, because I just feel detatched. It's the same reason I don't go out when I get the opportunity, I've been isolated for so long I guess I feel like that's the way it's supposed to be. (well that and the fact that I have no car or license, so going out means with my parents)




In the rest of this post I'm going to attempt to explain my situation a bit better, so it doesn't look like I'm some whining little kid who doesn't think mommy and daddy are being nice because they tell me to do somethign with my life. That's not what I'm pissed off at them about. I know I'm lazy, I know I need to get a job and get out of their house. that's a problem of my own, and it bothers me as well.



My dad: I can pretty much sum up the way my dad has ever made me feel by describing 2 events.

1) I'm about 10 years old, my brother 8. My dad asks for us to stack up a pile of firewood he had delivered, up against the back of the house. We're given no instructions, othe than to stack them up against the back of the house. We do it, and the stack is a bit shaky (of course it is, we're 8 and 10). My dad comes home and sees it, and with us standing there, he says somethign to the effect of "I shouldn't have even bothered. I knew they would screw it up. I have to do everythign myself." Who the hell expects and 8 and 10 year old to stack wood perfectly? And then bitches about them being useless right in front of them?

2) I'm 16 or so and have a friend over. My dad asks me to do some work in the driveway, which is right outside my bedroom's outside door. I ask if I can do it later, and I'm told no, I have to do it now. So I open my door and turn on some music to listen to while I'm working. My dad comes out to the driveway and hears the music. He doesn't even hear it, and assumes it's "angry" music, and tells me, "turn of that garbage, I don't want to hear it". Not only was the CD one of HIS that I was borrowing, but it was Christian rock (Third Day). That's just the I feel like he sees me. Despise everythign about me, without looking or listening first.



My mom: She's controlling. VERY controlling. She wants a say in everything I do. If I don't do things exactly as she wants, she gets mad and storms off saying somethign like, "fine, do it however you want", and will be in a bad mood for a while. Or she'll just straight up ask "why do you have to question everything I say?" So, I should listen to her advice on how to do things, right? Here's some examples of the way she wants things done, and the things she does to make me feel like I don't matter:

-The bathroom window looks out onto the driveway. You DO NOT close the blinds because someone is out there while you're wanting to go to the bathroom. No one can see into there during the day, and it DOES NOT need to be closed.
-Butter has to be spread slowly across bread, and microwaved beforehand so that it's soft enough.
-The toilet lid should not make noise when it is closed. If it does, you're slamming it.
-You NEVER hold your fork in your fist while using it to hold any meat you are cutting. The handle of the fork must run along your index finger and into your palm, and the cut must be made ALONG the tines, NOT between them. Cutting meat in public any way other than this is embarrasing, and will bring threats to not be taken out anymore.
-People should go to bed by 11pm or so, midnight at the latest. This includes when I have no classes or anythign the next day, and I'm living 2000 miles away from her. She used to ask me if I was gettign to bed ontime over AIM, or fuss at me for not being in bed yet.
-About 3 or 4 days of the week my mom will get up and make breakfast. She asks everyone what they wants, and makes it, usually an omollette or something. When I come in, she says "I'll be done in here soon, so you can make something." So you're making breakfast for everyone but me? Even for my 26 year odl brother who's never held a job and never lived away from home? At least I tried, by going to college. I fucked that up, but I TRIED to do something wth my life.
-Same thing as breakfast, but with dinner. She (they) did it tonight. I went inside to go to the bathroom, and saw they had cooked sausages on the grill. They actually cooked some for me, but never told me. Mine were cold and in the microwave on a plate, and everyone else was done eating already.



I'm not making this shit up. Tetsuo will tell you. When I was living in Phoenix, away from my parents, I still got nagged by my mom all the time. She would call, or message me on AIM. She would want to know if I was getting to bed on time, if I was eating right, exercising, telling me how to keep my apartment clean, how to most efficiently take my clothes to the laundry room, tellign me how many bottles of water I should drink within a 24 hour period and how to make a chart I could mark as I drank each bottle. She once spent 5 minutes explaining in detail over the phone how to take my turkey out of the oven without spilling grease out of the pan.

And no, my brother doesn't deal with any of this shit. He is genuinely loved, and given tons of positive attention. hell, they still buy him video games on a regular basis, and never say anything about him needing a job. The last thing I asked for was a $5 ball end replacement for one of my piercings, which fell off and I lost. I was told too bad, if I had a job I could buy a replacement. Last week they bought him a Final Fantasy game for Gameboy, and never thought twice about it.


So I have my own issues, and I have to get past them or work through them. Feeling like I'm not supposed ot be able to interact positively with other people and so I should just be isolated for my whole life, or just my laziness and procrastination. Then my parents add their bullshit to it all, and get on my case about how I rinse the laundry detergent cup wrong, it just gets to me.




I'll stop there. Hopefully it's clear now that my anger and frustration is a combination of 2 things. 1) I've got my own issues I need to deal with 2) My parents do a great job of nagging me and making me feel worthless, which adds to my frustrations.

[gpw11]

I agree with Cobra 100%.  Look, we don't know the full story of what's going on here (I didn't see the original post, but I can guess at it), and chances are it was but a snapshot of whatever is going on in his life.  We tend to fill in the blanks with what we relate to.  Who knows what his relationship with his parents is actually like and who knows what his situation is actually like.  While it may be easy for you and I to sit there and imagine that we could deal with it better, chances are that is as far from the truth as it could be.  His parents could very well be over controlling, and I'd be willing to bet that his situation is something we could not possibly relate to at all because of the differences in how we were raised leading to the differences in our general outlook.

Like I said, I didn't see the original post, but what good is jumping down someone's throat going to do?  It's not tough love, it's not a smack in the face clearing the cobwebs, it does nothing but contribute to the problem.  "Be like me you failure.  Sure I probably came from a much better situation and as such am more equiped to handle any bumps along the road, but if you have trouble doing it you're worthless."  Leave that shit for the unreasoning meat heads in the army.   We're all friends here, lets have some fucking tact.

As for posting your problems on the internet, I find it has a therapeutic effect because sometimes you just need to tell people shit, and it's a lot easier telling someone you don't actually know.  If it comes down to telling a bunch of people on a forum and dropping $100/hr for a therapist over every detail in your life, why not go the free way.

I see after trying to post this W7RE has replied.  Sorry if this is a repetition or out of context. 

[idolminds]

Your parents suck, dude.

[angrykeebler]

I guess I should explain myself. I wasn't looking for pity, or necessarily even advice. I just wanted to vent, and felt like this was a place where I could do that. I expected some people to tell me to go get a job, some to say "yea, that sucks", and othera to not even reply. I felt like I was attacked, which made me question if I even wanted to come here anymore. I haven't really posted in here for a long time anyway, because I just feel detatched. It's the same reason I don't go out when I get the opportunity, I've been isolated for so long I guess I feel like that's the way it's supposed to be. (well that and the fact that I have no car or license, so going out means with my parents)




In the rest of this post I'm going to attempt to explain my situation a bit better, so it doesn't look like I'm some whining little kid who doesn't think mommy and daddy are being nice because they tell me to do somethign with my life. That's not what I'm pissed off at them about. I know I'm lazy, I know I need to get a job and get out of their house. that's a problem of my own, and it bothers me as well.



My dad: I can pretty much sum up the way my dad has ever made me feel by describing 2 events.

1) I'm about 10 years old, my brother 8. My dad asks for us to stack up a pile of firewood he had delivered, up against the back of the house. We're given no instructions, othe than to stack them up against the back of the house. We do it, and the stack is a bit shaky (of course it is, we're 8 and 10). My dad comes home and sees it, and with us standing there, he says somethign to the effect of "I shouldn't have even bothered. I knew they would screw it up. I have to do everythign myself." Who the hell expects and 8 and 10 year old to stack wood perfectly? And then bitches about them being useless right in front of them?

2) I'm 16 or so and have a friend over. My dad asks me to do some work in the driveway, which is right outside my bedroom's outside door. I ask if I can do it later, and I'm told no, I have to do it now. So I open my door and turn on some music to listen to while I'm working. My dad comes out to the driveway and hears the music. He doesn't even hear it, and assumes it's "angry" music, and tells me, "turn of that garbage, I don't want to hear it". Not only was the CD one of HIS that I was borrowing, but it was Christian rock (Third Day). That's just the I feel like he sees me. Despise everythign about me, without looking or listening first.



My mom: She's controlling. VERY controlling. She wants a say in everything I do. If I don't do things exactly as she wants, she gets mad and storms off saying somethign like, "fine, do it however you want", and will be in a bad mood for a while. Or she'll just straight up ask "why do you have to question everything I say?" So, I should listen to her advice on how to do things, right? Here's some examples of the way she wants things done, and the things she does to make me feel like I don't matter:

-The bathroom window looks out onto the driveway. You DO NOT close the blinds because someone is out there while you're wanting to go to the bathroom. No one can see into there during the day, and it DOES NOT need to be closed.
-Butter has to be spread slowly across bread, and microwaved beforehand so that it's soft enough.
-The toilet lid should not make noise when it is closed. If it does, you're slamming it.
-You NEVER hold your fork in your fist while using it to hold any meat you are cutting. The handle of the fork must run along your index finger and into your palm, and the cut must be made ALONG the tines, NOT between them. Cutting meat in public any way other than this is embarrasing, and will bring threats to not be taken out anymore.
-People should go to bed by 11pm or so, midnight at the latest. This includes when I have no classes or anythign the next day, and I'm living 2000 miles away from her. She used to ask me if I was gettign to bed ontime over AIM, or fuss at me for not being in bed yet.
-About 3 or 4 days of the week my mom will get up and make breakfast. She asks everyone what they wants, and makes it, usually an omollette or something. When I come in, she says "I'll be done in here soon, so you can make something." So you're making breakfast for everyone but me? Even for my 26 year odl brother who's never held a job and never lived away from home? At least I tried, by going to college. I fucked that up, but I TRIED to do something wth my life.
-Same thing as breakfast, but with dinner. She (they) did it tonight. I went inside to go to the bathroom, and saw they had cooked sausages on the grill. They actually cooked some for me, but never told me. Mine were cold and in the microwave on a plate, and everyone else was done eating already.



I'm not making this shit up. Tetsuo will tell you. When I was living in Phoenix, away from my parents, I still got nagged by my mom all the time. She would call, or message me on AIM. She would want to know if I was getting to bed on time, if I was eating right, exercising, telling me how to keep my apartment clean, how to most efficiently take my clothes to the laundry room, tellign me how many bottles of water I should drink within a 24 hour period and how to make a chart I could mark as I drank each bottle. She once spent 5 minutes explaining in detail over the phone how to take my turkey out of the oven without spilling grease out of the pan.

And no, my brother doesn't deal with any of this shit. He is genuinely loved, and given tons of positive attention. hell, they still buy him video games on a regular basis, and never say anything about him needing a job. The last thing I asked for was a $5 ball end replacement for one of my piercings, which fell off and I lost. I was told too bad, if I had a job I could buy a replacement. Last week they bought him a Final Fantasy game for Gameboy, and never thought twice about it.


So I have my own issues, and I have to get past them or work through them. Feeling like I'm not supposed ot be able to interact positively with other people and so I should just be isolated for my whole life, or just my laziness and procrastination. Then my parents add their bullshit to it all, and get on my case about how I rinse the laundry detergent cup wrong, it just gets to me.




I'll stop there. Hopefully it's clear now that my anger and frustration is a combination of 2 things. 1) I've got my own issues I need to deal with 2) My parents do a great job of nagging me and making me feel worthless, which adds to my frustrations.

You know for most people being treated like this would give them the incentive and drive to work and get out. If you are miserable at home then find a job and leave? 

The way I see it you are doing this to yourself. Lets say a man is wasting away in prison but the door before him lies open. The warden says "You can be a free man, you just have to get up off the floor and climb the stairs to the outside." Yet he does nothing. While he is in prison, the warden controls the prisoner because hey its prison and he is the warden. He owns the place. Who is to blame?

Also, your parents behavior do not warrant your sick fantasies of killing them. Unless they have been molesting you or something like that then it is uncalled for. Thoughts like that lead no where good.

[Quemaqua]

Yeah... I think everybody just needs to vent sometimes.  God knows I do it enough.  I come on here and bitch about stuff and swear too much and whatever else... but I always feel better afterward.  I think that's why they invented the internet.  But it works both ways... I know I've rubbed people the wrong way on more than one occasion.  I probably do that too often, maybe.  Yeah.

Anyway... like everybody said, though I guess it's beating a dead horse... W7, just get out.  I think that's the best thing you can do.  Most people I know, their relationship with their parents got way better after they got out on their own and didn't have to go back.  I'm sure you'd feel the same.  Parents can be weird, but it sounds like yours have some issues of their own.  Get some distance.