Topic: A mainstream gaming article, that doesn't make me want to punch the writer.

[Pugnate]

That's currently my standard for judging mainstream gaming articles.

http://tech.uk.msn.com/features/article.aspx?cp-documentid=6005916

[Ghandi]

Content aside, this person is a horrible writer. The lead paragraph alone just does not work. I would put an X through the entire thing if I was editing it.

Edit: Sorry for this post being somewhat irrelevant, I understand that the original point was not supposed to be about the writers ability but rather the content itself. Still, I couldn't help but point that out.

[Quemaqua]

I read the first three paragraphs and decided I didn't care what the guy had to say because he couldn't say it well enough.  Then by a few paragraphs later, I also completely disagreed with his point about console internet multiplayer capability.  I can't stomach console games online.  It's entirely counter-productive to me, not to mention you have to pay for the privilege.  So... yeah, I just stopped there.

[WindAndConfusion]

Content aside, this person is a horrible writer. The lead paragraph alone just does not work. I would put an X through the entire thing if I was editing it.

You didn't notice this?

Patrick Goss: Editor - Tech & Gadgets

Moving on...

Forget your PlayStation v Xbox battle, there’s a war that has been fought in gaming that stretches back for decades, PCs versus consoles. At stake – the crown of the ultimate gaming experience - and this epic death-match has taken more twists or turns than a whole host of racing sims.

Inconsistent spelling of "versus"; also, when switching between expanded and abbreviated spellings of a word, the expanded form should always come first (barring some serious reason to the contrary).
Improper joining of independent clauses.
Poor use of noun phrases.
Phrase should use a colon, not a dash.
Dash has been used for two different grammatical purposes within the same friggin' sentence. Also notice he used different characters: - (hyphen or short dash) and – (long dash).
A death-match is full of twists and turns the same way a race is full of parries and thrusts. Dipshit should watch his metaphors.

So that's two sentences, four clauses, and six serious stylistic errors.

On the one hand you have an ever-adapting power house of a machine – which brought the world networked gaming, cutting-edge graphics, awesome sound and some of the most immersive games ever created.
 
On the other, you have systems that offer fabulous graphics and sound through your television, multiplayer gaming from the couch and that works right out of the box with the games that are meant to run on it.

This guy has managed to make three paragraphs out of just four sentences. I realize this is common form on teh Intarwebs, but it annoys me when journalists editards do it.

But have the latest consoles – the Xbox 360, the PlayStation 3 and Nintendo’s Wii – finally taken the quantum leap forward that has pushed the PC into retirement? Or has the PC – that most plucky of contenders * got enough in the tank to bounce back once again?

Should read either, "and the Wii," or, "Microsoft Xbox 360, Sony Playstation 3, and..."
"Quantum leap" literally means, "the smallest change that is physically possible." In other words, it means the exact opposite of what he wanted to say.
Forgot a (crucially important) dash here.
I had no idea that cars bounce. I mean, unless you pimp it out with hydraulics first. But even with hydraulics, how would you "bounce back"?

I'll stop now, you get the point. For more editor-bashing fun, I suggest you check the Grauniad's style guidelines. Here are some random quotes from page D:

De Niro, Robert

...

Dinky Toys
TM

...

disabled people
not "the disabled"

Use positive language about disability, avoiding outdated terms that stereotype or stigmatise. Terms to avoid, with acceptable alternatives in brackets, include victim of, crippled by, suffering from, afflicted by (prefer person who has, person with); wheelchair bound, in a wheelchair (uses a wheelchair); invalid (disabled person); mentally handicapped, backward, retarded, slow (person with learning difficulties); the disabled, the handicapped, the blind, the deaf (disabled people, blind people, deaf people); deaf and dumb (deaf and speech-impaired, hearing and speech-impaired)

...

Doctor Who
the title of the series; the character's name is the Doctor, and it should never be abbreviated to Dr Who

...

duct tape
not duck tape
[Of course, that's fucking wrong...]

...

dyslexia
write "Paul has dyslexia" rather than labelling him "a dyslexic" or saying he "suffers from" dyslexia

[PyroMenace]

So like... when are we going to get our website off the ground the show these idiots whose boss.

[WindAndConfusion]

So like... when are we going to get our website off the ground the show these idiots whose boss.

Highly informal.
Should read, "off the ground to show these idiots..."
Should read, "who's..."
Sentence should end with a question mark.

God I wish it was twenty degrees cooler so I could sleep...

[Antares]

I don't have time to read either of your posts wind, but they are both very colorful, and that is something you should be proud of.

[Ghandi]

You didn't notice this?

To be honest, I didn't delve too deeply into the site. I got out of there quickly.

Anyways, any reputable site still goes through an editing process, regardless of who writes the article.

Also, Ant gets props for making fun of you.

[WindAndConfusion]

Anyways, any reputable site still goes through an editing process, regardless of who writes the article.

That's not true, and anyway in this case the guy doing the editing would also be the guy doing the writing.

[Ghandi]

Larger sites have an editing process with which a piece must go through in order to be published. There is not one person in charge of all editing.

[WindAndConfusion]

I don't know about MSNBC specifically, but a small section like "gaming & tech" is unlikely to have more than one editor. This one editor is in charge of all editing for his section.

Second, although some newspapers (and, I assume, news sites) have a policy that requires all articles to get vetted by a separate editorial review board, this policy is frequently ignored. Especially when the author of the article is an editor himself. (See, authors usually get paid based on the number of words they get published, and ERBs have a habit of cutting articles way down or even rejecting them outright, which means the author gets paid less, which means authors who can get away with it, will circumvent the ERB as much as possible.)

For the record, I have that most awesome and underpaying of jobs, ghostwriter. I've had articles published in newspapers before. I know how this stuff works.

[idolminds]

omg Ghostwriter! Do you get to wear that little pen around your neck like the kids on TV do?

[WindAndConfusion]

No. Mostly I get to tell college kids to fuck off, and that I am not going to write their fucking term papers for them (even if the going rate is $50/page).

[Ghandi]

Well, I work for a paper as well, so I also know how it works. It truly depends on the size of the company as far as the editing process and level of expectation. Good editors keep as much original content as possible, so the better you are, the less gets cut.

Clearly,though, this guy didn't get his article edited.

[Cobra951]

For the record, I have that most awesome and underpaying of jobs, ghostwriter. I've had articles published in newspapers before. I know how this stuff works.

Well, you clearly know your grammar--something seldom seen in message boards or amateur publications.  Obtusely poor use of English reduces the perceived intelligence of the writer, and therefore his credibility.  I don't think I would have spent so much effort on dissecting this article, though.  You must have been bored in your sleeplessness.

[WindAndConfusion]

Guess wot you never noticed all them times I posted drunk.