Topic: Woah man

[gpw11]

I'm just doing some work at the library.  I was being rather productive until a thought crossed my mind;

Because of the internet I've probably seen more girls naked then all of my ancestors combined. 

Woah.

[scottws]

Yeah, I'd say it is a pretty safe bet.

[beo]

that is awesome. but our descendants will get to experience 3d ultra-porn that assaults senses that we haven't even implanted into out feeble, non bionically altered minds yet.

[gpw11]

While that is true, I think we're in that magical generation that will appreciate porn the most.  Like, it was a bitch to actually get a hold of until I was like 17 or so.  I mean, you could always buy the magazines or VHS tapes from shady stores who didn't care, but that shit costs money, and it's hard to justify.  Then all of a sudden you can see all the porn in the world without leaving your house....basically for free.  The contrast is amazing.

[Ghandi]

You know, we have probably also inadvertently seen more penises than any of our ancestors. 

[gpw11]

Oh, certainly.  Keebs probably more than most. 

[Ghandi]

Well, I would hardly call that inadvertent.

[WindAndConfusion]

(click to show/hide)

Thanks to Internets, you have also seen this.

[PyroMenace]

Thanks to Internets my hard drive, you have also seen this.

Fixed.

[Ghandi]

That's a tough fetish to satisfy. Penis nose is not a common disease.

[WindAndConfusion]

Here's an easy one: A balding fat man pushing fifty whose sexual fetish is to dry-hump balloons.

In other words, it is Ghandi's YouTube account.

http://www.youtube.com/user/billoon45

[Ghandi]

Talk about a pedosmile -

Also, I would like to point out that I am not the one actively searching for balloon-humping fetishes.

...Or am I?

[gpw11]

Ok, as some of you may know, I'm a huge fan of Something Awful's weekend web.  A few weeks ago they did one on a forum for people with balloon fetishes.  I was a bit suprised because after a year or so of weekend web and like 6 years of reading Savage Love, I was under the impression that I knew of, or at least could imagine every major fetish.  SUPRISE MOTHERFUCKER, PEOPLE WANT TO FUCK BALOONS.  Why?  I don't know, I personally hate condoms, and couldn't imagine what fun a balloon by itself would represent.  Either way, maybe one of the funnier installments.  People complaining about kinds at the park torturing balloons?  Comedic gold.

BTW, what the fuck is up with that guy?  I mean, apart from the obvious, watch some of his non-balloon fucking videos and just look at how he talks.  Whacked.

[scottws]

What a fucking weirdo.

[gpw11]

Perhaps I'm becoming to empathetic, but I actually feel really sorry for this guy.  He humps balloons, there's something wrong with him, and he works a job part time for like $10 an hour.  That's sort of sad.

[Quemaqua]

I don't think I'll be clicking anything here.  I don't even want to know. 

[WindAndConfusion]

Perhaps I'm becoming to empathetic, but I actually feel really sorry for this guy.  He humps balloons, there's something wrong with him, and he works a job part time for like $10 an hour.  That's sort of sad.

There's a video where he climbs inside of a giant balloon.

It deflates as he's inside it. I can't help but to think how easy it would be for him to suffocate, and I wonder how long it would take for anyone to notice.

One day, this man will be found dead, asphyxiated, inside a giant balloon, with no one but a webcam watching.

The video will be uploaded to YouTube, where I will laugh at it, confirming that I am a terrible human being.

[WindAndConfusion]

Oh God, on YouTube, under "related videos," there's a whole series on people popping their pimples.

I think it's another fetish, but I dare not see this depravity.

Although I do have this (827 KB gif) on my harddrive:

(click to show/hide)

[Mod Warning] Spoiler features gratuitous video doom.  View at your own risk. [/warning]

[TheOtherBelmont]

Oh God, on YouTube, under "related videos," there's a whole series on people popping their pimples.

Someone posted a bunch of those on the Penny Arcade forums, some of them are pretty horrible, one of them was of a dude getting a cyst drained on his neck.

[gpw11]

Oh man, I can't wait until weekend web hits the pimple popping forums.


BTW, is that a body being ejected in that gif?

[Quemaqua]

I get that impression, though it's impossible to tell given the quality.  If so, that's fucked up.

[Ghandi]

It's just a door. It's not a person.

[Quemaqua]

Yeah, on second look, it's way too small to be a person.

[WindAndConfusion]

Yeah, on second look, it's way too small to be a person.

It only looks that way 'cuz all his bones have been crushed into powder by that point.

[Pugnate]

You know, we have probably also inadvertently seen more penises than any of our ancestors. 

I am pretty sure that was true even before the internet was invented.

Wait.. what?

[scottws]

Pretty sure that is a person.

[Quemaqua]

I doubt it.  It only looks like it for about 2 frames right when it flies from the car.  None of the others look like a person at all.

[iPPi]

I doubt it.  It only looks like it for about 2 frames right when it flies from the car.  None of the others look like a person at all.

The Youtube video is pretty clear that that was a person.

[Quemaqua]

Then that's severely fucked up and it shouldn't have been posted.  Given my own disbelief, I won't bother berating W&C much; but dude, give it a fucking rest, will you?

[Pugnate]

Ugh... my curiosity got the better of me.

[ren]

Then that's severely fucked up and it shouldn't have been posted.  Given my own disbelief, I won't bother berating W&C much; but dude, give it a fucking rest, will you?

Eh, he's putting them in spoilers and giving warnings saying that it's graphic. I don't see the problem.

[TheOtherBelmont]

Eh, he's putting them in spoilers and giving warnings saying that it's graphic. I don't see the problem.

Que put it in spoiler tags....

[Pugnate]

Oh man, I can't wait until weekend web hits the pimple popping forums.


BTW, is that a body being ejected in that gif?

What is weekend web? A website?

[Ghandi]

Then that's severely fucked up and it shouldn't have been posted.  Given my own disbelief, I won't bother berating W&C much; but dude, give it a fucking rest, will you?

Quoted for truth.

At the very least, keep it in spoiler tags.

[WindAndConfusion]

Then I guess I shouldn't post the video of Inejiro Asanuma getting assassinated on live TV by a crazed sword-wielding Japanese youth.

Which is a shame.

Because it's awesome.

[Ghandi]

Thank you for putting awesome in italics. Because we totally wouldn't have caught the sarcasm if you didn't. God knows if you didn't question our intellect who would.

[gpw11]

Weekend Web

A weekly feature of SomethingAwful where some guy visits a bunch of forums and takes screenshots of fucked up posts.  It's hit or miss, but I generally check it out every week because when it hits it's fucking gold.