So, as part of my recent effort to "turn over a new leaf" I decided that I should stop trying to sleep with girls and then avoid them because of some deep seeded philosophy that having a girlfriend is the direct inverse of having fun. As such, I've been putting in an effort to actually date girls. This has been both good and bad, in a few ways.
I.) Met a girl at a bar, didn't grab a number and then ran into her at the rec center when I was going for a swim. Went out for a couple drinks, she was low-class and totally looking for a serious relationship...like LOOKING for one. I told her I wasn't but we should just chill and have a good time. I ended up sleeping with her, which she later probably regretted because "She's never done this before". I'd feel bad, but it's not like I lied and it was all totally her call. She probably just thought that I'd change my mind or something. Girls are dumb like that (but to be fair, I know guys are just as retarded).
II.) Ran into a girl who works at a coffee shop I always go to. I used to kind of go out with her friend and hooked up with her once years ago. She was moving away but wanted me to go to her going away party. I did, it was lame, but she introduced me to one of her friends who seemed pretty awesome. We decided to meet up and go to the beach. We actually worked out the details that night like a rough time, place and day. My phone was dead so I just gave her my number...now, some would view this as a mistake, but it actually worked out to be the best screening method ever. The day we were supposed to meet came by and I didn't hear from her. Not a huge loss, I wasn't really banking on it and figured I would have heard from her a few days ago if it was going to happen. She called a couple of days later, extremely apologetic, saying that a bunch of shit caught up, it slipped her mind and she didn't save my name with the number and couldn't find it at first. Fair enough, set up another day to meet, I have her number this time. A day before we're supposed to meet, I call and leave a message. I don't hear back, we never meet. I'm not torn up about this at all, but could see how some might be. I know shit comes up, people change their minds, or decide that something might be a bad idea....I've been there before but I always make sure to let the other party know that something isn't going to happen rather than just drop off the face of the earth. If I wasn't so laid back I could see shit like this just eating someone up inside.
III.) Another girl texts me waaaaay too much and calls at retarded hours for no reason. I don't actually remember anything about her really but she's annoying as hell and won't really get the point. And by "get the point" I mean I straight up told her that I'm getting the impression we're on completely different pages and this isn't going to work out and/or go anywhere. Like, we met, had a short conversation, exchanged numbers and then met again a month or so later. That's when the texts and calls started. She's all like "Well, we can still be friends" and I'm all thinking like "C'mon, I know what you're trying to do here". Oh, and if you're a girl, never tell a guy that you and your friends have a nickname for him after you only know him from a 10 min. conversation while waiting for a cab outside a bar. Like the nickname itself isn't a problem but it's scary as shit that there'd even be ANY girltalk going on after something so inconsequential.
IV.) I've been on 3 dates with this other girl, who I am all about. A couple years older, very funny and quirky, but impossible to read. She's super fun to hang out with and this is a girl I would actually LIKE to date (to elaborate, at one point during one of our dates I looked over and she was sharpening a knife on a rock...wtf? That's the kind of shit that no one else does and will keep me interested). The problematic thing is that she's impossible to read (like I said), which could also be why I like her so much. This makes things complicated because all of a sudden I actually care if I see her again and start stressing about shit, like when to call...which makes me feel like a douche. I also totally have never actually DATED a chick like this before, where you actually go out and do stuff BEFORE getting their pants off...usually I'd have a hookup and it would go from there...somewhat. It's like actually stressful because I'm like intimidated to make any moves. She initiated the first make out and we still totally haven't fully hooked up because I'm not pressing for the apartment invite. It's like playing american football your entire life and then just going and trying to wing it at rugby. The game is similar in concept, but you have to take it easy because you don't know the intricacies of the rules.
So, seriously, how the fuck do people do this all the time? Is this why some guys totally live by ridiculous sets of rules like "Never call more than once a week" and "Don't be too nice"? I could kind of see that making shit easier because you're just basically following a program, but at the same time, why the fuck would you ever break down any sort of human social interaction into a rule set? And how COULD you do that without feeling like a total clown?
